
Long live laughter!
|
 |
By Ulla Koskinen
Take note all ye of sombre mind! Humour is the essence of life in this grim and onerous world. Without it, living would be terrible.
But what is humour really? And what is that famous "sense of humour"?
A sense of humour reveals personality, age, and cultural background. It is an admirable characteristic, but even in this, too much is too much. It can even destroy a marriage.
At its best, humour makes life easier and unites people, at worst, it separates.
If it is not understood, humour can even lead to negative reactions and death threats. A sense of humour is defined by a person's overall situation in life, and physical well being.
"Life needs to be pleasant if one is to concentrate on things that are enjoyable. When a person is ill or afraid of losing a job, humour easily turns to cynicism, and it is difficult to concentrate on easygoing humour", says Paavo Kerkkänen, an occupational health psychologist an humour researcher.
People's sense of humour changes with age. Fifty-year-olds do not laugh at the same things that a ten-year-old finds funny.
The quantity of laughter decreases as illness and sorrow puts the brakes on laughter. People with whom one has grown accustomed to laugh may already be dead.
However, some people find that adversity develops their sense of humour. They may find it easier to laugh at themselves, and at life as a whole, including death.
A sense of humour is difficult to quantify, but there are certain common behavioural traits among those endowed with a it.
According to research, those with the keenest sense often want to be the focus of attention. They tend to be extroverted - even domineering.
"A person with a sense of humour does not have to be an entertainer who wants to perform, or someone who guffaws at jokes. Many people with a good sense of humour are quiet, subdued, and empathetic. A person blessed with this kind of silent sense of humour knows how to make people laugh, and to laugh at the right place at the right time."
Some people do not seem to have a sense of humour at all. "People like this are afraid of being targets of ridicule, avoiding situations in which they would make others laugh or in which they might laugh at others. They are afraid that others might consider them to be superfluous. They often tend to be the ones who feel more prone than others to being victims of workplace bullying, for instance."
Humour also has its negative side. It can be used to hide difficult things. Seeing everything as a topic for a joke can even cause a couple relationship to break down, even if a sense of humour is generally seen as a positive characteristic in a spouse.
An extroverted and socially gifted man who makes women laugh could be more prone to have affairs.
A lack of a sense of humour is not necessarily as bad as a bad sense of humour.
Gossiping, vilifying, revealing sensitive personal matters, and embarrassing others is not to a person's credit, no matter how funny they might seem.
Primitive subjects of humour, such as sex, eating, and defecation have always made people laugh. Children and old people laugh at them, if only they dare.
Middle-aged people are more prone to laugh at sex jokes than young people are.
"Young people are sensitive to sex issues, and can feel considerable pressure to succeed in that area. The middle-aged have realistic experiences. There have been bad experiences, resulting in lowered expectations, making it possible to laugh mercifully at those matters."
Blunders and mishaps of others are the funniest, once a person realises that the same could have befallen him, or herself, but it did not.
It is possible to catch one's self laughing at incomprehensible things. The standard for humour declines when company is present, and it is easier to laugh when one is tired.
"Many people laugh at other people's jokes either because they like the person, or they do so out of politeness. There is often someone in every group who does not laugh. Such people are men or women of principle, and feel bored with the situation, and refuse to take part in such flattery", Kerkkänen ponders.
"It is good that not everyone laughs. Humiliation can make people angry. A fart may be funny, but it doesn't smell good!"
Intelligence also gives reasons for a propensity to laugh.
"If intellectual, more refined humour is involved, intelligence is needed. If you don't happen to be very smart, you won't know how to laugh at jokes requiring intuition. Fart and poop jokes can be understood with fewer IQ points", Kerkkänen says.
Humour unites inner circles and excludes outsiders. It can be part of a family's inside humour to refer to a mother who has put on weight as "chubby". But what if a next-door neighbour at the mailbox says "good morning, chubby"? Not very endearing, is it?
Being on the same wavelength in humour brings friends closer together.
According to research, having a similar sense of humour is one secret behind long-lasting couple relationships.
Helsingin Sanomat / First published in print 7.1.2008
ULLA KOSKINEN / Helsingin Sanomat
ulla.koskinen@sanoma.fi
|

| 8.1.2008 - THIS WEEK |
Long live laughter!
|
|